Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – 70th Anniversary Grand Prix 2020

What did you think of that then?

Although we didn’t see tyres exploding as much as last week’s race, they did play an important part in the race.

On the starting grid, Max Verstappen was the only car in the top 10 that started on the hard tyres, which were last week’s medium tyres (confused? Me too).

He comfortably sailed past Hulkenberg at the start, and then as both Mercedes were struggling on the medium tyres decided against ‘driving like a granny’, as instructed by the Red Bull pitwall to preserve tyre life, and started pushing. After both Mercedes came in for their first pitstop fairly early on, Verstappen was off and only briefly lost the lead when he came in for his first pitstop on lap 33, only to whizz past Bottas on the first corner out of the pitlane.

A question that does have to be asked is what on earth is going on with Vettel? Yet another week where he failed to get into Q3, and then spins for no apparent reason on the first lap which puts him plam last. Has he given up aleady because he’s leaving Ferrari at the end of the season, or just plain can’t be bothered to help Ferrari due to how they’ve treated him, or is that Ferrari really a complete dog of a car to drive?

We didn’t see a safety car this week, virtual or otherwise and the only retirement was Magnussen. No idea when that happened, I was obviously mid tweet saving!!

Talking of tweets, there were so many this week that I was struggling to keep up with them. Still I did, and have whittled them down to a final 10.

So, without further ado, here are the Funniest Tweet Awards for the F1 70th Anniversary Grand Prix:

10th place

We wanted to know what’s up with Vettel, @sootycorbett has provided an answer …

9th place

@PatrickSikler with an action replay of Vettel at the start of the race … Wwwweeeeeeeee!!!

8th place

@stargateoracle with an action replay of Albon’s top drawer outside line overtaking of Kimi …

7th place

@TomTheMadHatter with another look of Hamilton slamming on the brakes as he came into the pitlane for his second pitstop. Slowed down just in the nick of time. (I’ve tried this technique when I spied a mobile speed camera hiding in a hedge, unfortunately for me my Golf doesn’t have quite the same braking capacity as an F1 car … one speed awareness course for your truly!)

6th place

@pgillett2017 with live onboard footage of Albon following his very early first pitstop where he came out right at the back …

5th place

@timwagner66 with Red Bull’s new Health & Safety expert. Following last weekend’s race and the pitwall instruction to Max to stay hydrated, this week Max turned the tables and enquired whether the pitwall/garage had been drinking enough water, and not only that added that they all had sweaty hands so he hoped they had sanitizer too. F1, your public health service broadcaster …

4th place

@_DavidBroad_ with the live reaction from the Ferrari pitwall when Vettel came onto the radio and told them: “It is in the gap that we don’t like. We spoke about it this morning. I’ll hang in there, but you know that you’ve messed up!”

What on earth is going on at Ferrari? Answers in the comments below!

3rd place

@seawildearth with live footage of Max experiencing a bit of deja vu when he overtakes a Mercedes with blistering tyres …

2nd place

@FvB2309 with live footage of the Hulk going on for another pitstop in an attempt to go for fastest lap … starting in P3 where did Hulk end up though? P7 … where else …

1st place

This week’s winner is @Jontys_Corner with an accurate visual of Bottas’s tyres after 6 laps of the race … is the tyres or the car??

Hope you enjoyed this week’s selection? As always let me know which ones were your favourites in the comments below.If you want to join in the fun, it couldn’t be easier:

  1. Follow me on Twitter (@Pitlane_Girl)
  2. Tweet something funny during the race, making sure to tag me
  3. Cross your fingers

That’s it.

The Funniest Tweet Awards will be back next week for the Spanish GP.

Until then, have a great week.

x

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Psst, there’s a new virtual racing league in town

Global Racing Series has just announced the first teams that will be competing in the inaugural V10 R-League season. Williams Esports, BWT Racing Point Esports Team, Ford (Fordzilla) and JAESA Team Suzuki are four of the eight teams that will compete in the virtual championship and battle over the £100,000 (GBP) prize pot.

What is the Global Racing Series?

COVID-19 has seen a massive spike in interest in virtual motorsport, with most of the main championships holding virtual races to give motorsports fans something to watch.

The Global Racing Series was devised through a partnership between Gfinity Plc, the UK’s leading esports operator who has first-hand experience running global gaming competitions, and ADMM, the owners and operators of the Yas Marina Circuit in Abu Dhabi.

It is a long-term, multi-championship initiative designed to create a new ecosystem for the professional sim racing sector and to redefine racing through unique formats that are only possible in the virtual world. The V10 R-League is the first championship to be announced.

Gfinity CEO, John Clark said: “The V10 R-League will take virtual motorsport to the next level and redefine racing. Created in record time, it has already captured the imagination of teams, drivers, broadcasters and brands.”

Saif Al Noami, Acting CEO of ADMM said: “To see such great racing brands committing to the V10 R-League is a testament to the concept. Seeing how our strategic focus, investment in premium and virtual racing is turning into a reality show the strength of the team. Both Gfinity and ADMM have been working hand-in-hand over the last few months, and there will be further exciting team and competition announcements to follow in the coming weeks.”

What platform will the V10 R-League use?

Following careful evaluation, the Assetto Corsa platform was chosen as the best fit for the Global Racing Series due to the tracks, visual quality, custom cars and future development potential.

All teams will race on the track in a brand new car, the GRS-1 that has been designed specifically for the league to bring maximum excitement. It is an open-wheeled, single-seater car and being virtual the GRS-1 is unrestricted when it comes to regulations. Weighing 700kg, the car can reach speeds of up to 220 mph (354 kph).

It is powered by a V10 engine, one of the most evocative sounds in motorsport history, which has a power output of 900bhp. The combination of both the engine and car weight will offer drivers an optimised performance in the wheel-to-wheel action that virtual racing allows. Although it’s only virtual, viewers will still be able to see and hear the performance of this iconic engine.

All competing teams will be able to design bespoke liveries for their cars.

Teams announced so far

The first four teams to be announced are; Williams Esports, BWT Racing Point Esports Team, Ford (Fordzilla) and JAESA Team Suzuki.

Fordzilla, Ford’s first-ever esports team, was launched at Gamescom in 2019 and is made o=up of five market teams; Germany, Spain, Italy, France and the UK. Building on their real-world racing heritage, Ford is looking to compete at the highest level on the virtual racing stage.

Led by a common racing soul and a desire to achieve great results in the esports arena, JAESA Team Suzuki is a partnership between the Jean Alesi eSports Academy and Suzuki. Already competing across different platforms, they have secured solid results in international sim racing championships.

Team Principal of Williams Esports, Steven English said: “This series is an exciting prospect for sim racing. The unique format will offer something different to the majority of our competitions, and a line-up that includes some of the biggest names in motorsport will help grow the credibility and professionalism of virtual racing.”

Adding to that, Jefferson Slack, Managing Director (Commercial and Marketing), BWT Racing Point Esports Team, said: “Our esports programme has gone from strength to strength in recent years, and now forms a key pillar of our commercial operations. We see this as a natural expansion of a programme that continues to grow in popularity and helps us connect with a new audience. So it’s a win-win all around, and I’m looking forward to seeing what our guys can do.”

What format will the V10 R-League take?

The league format, specifically designed for broadcast audiences that focuses on a team championship, will see all eight teams compete head-to-head in a round-robin format, earning points for their team until one team is crowned champion of all.

In each match, two teams will race over three original race challenges, designed to ensure the result is a win, draw or lose, and each team will consist of three drivers who must compete across all three race formats. This means that both teams and drivers will have to devise new strategies for some of the world’s most iconic circuits.

The professional sim drivers will race from their homes on a full racing rig while their camera and audio feeds are controlled live from Gfinity’s production studio in London.

Just like real-world racing, the broadcasts will feature live on-set analysis from a host and racing experts.

Season one will air ‘as live’ from the Gfinity Arena across both broadcast and digital channels this month, with season two airing in the first quarter of 2021.

Have a look at the trailer:

Will you be checking this new virtual racing championship out?

Let me know in the comments.

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Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – British Grand Prix 2020

OK, so today’s race was a bit like a mash-up between an artisan sandwich with a stale cheese sandwich. All the excitement of the artisan bread sandwiched around the stale cheese.

With two safety cars before lap 20, courtesy of Albon becoming the punter instead of the puntee, and knocking Magnussen out of the race, and then Kvyat suffering a heavy impact due to some kind of failure, the race then settled down, and even the commentators started to sound bored.

But then, three laps from the end Sainz’s tyres decided to go and he dropped down the order, then Bottas’s tyre literally imploded, Verstappen overtook for 2nd place and then one-quarter of the way around the final lap, with Verstappen 34 seconds behind him, Hamilton’s tyre began delaminating.

As Hamilton nursed his car around the rest of the final lap, the gap to Verstappen was rapidly decreasing. Would he be overtaken in the dying moments of the race?

Hamilton crossed the line with only 3 working tyres and 5.8 seconds ahead of Verstappen.

Which left the Red Bull pitwall kicking themselves for taking advantage of a free pitstop and bringing Verstappen in to pop him onto softs to grab fastest lap, 5 laps before the end of the race. (Isn’t Captain Hindsight a wonderful thing?)

Meanwhile on the Mercedes pitwall:

Which brings me neatly round to this week’s Funniest Tweet Awards.

Not too much to really get excited about this race, bar the beginning and the end, but as always Twitter did not disappoint.

So here are the Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards for the British Grand Prix 2020:

10th place

@seawildearth with uncovered footage of Grosjean’s first ever driving lesson as his instructor describes cornering to the learner driver.

9th place

@photo_gt97 with footage of the action that the midfield cars provided us during the mid part of the race.

8th place

@_DavidBroad_ with pitlane footage as everyone dived (dove?) into the pits to change tyres after the safety car was deployed for the second time following Kvyat’s crash.

7th place

@timwagner66 with track footage as Grosjean desperately tried to hold position … several times … resulting in two black and white flags.

6th place

@FvB2309 with footage of the tyres at the latter stages of the race.

5th place

@ChrisJKenworthy with a dliemma between two drivers, when Verstappen was reminded by the pitwall to drink.

4th place

@TarasDemerson with footage of the Mercedes pitwall AND Hamilton fans worldwide as they saw his tyres start delaminating on the final lap.

3rd place

@GvanderGarde … following Kvyat’s crash, maybe the camerman should have know not to get too close?

2nd place

@stargateoracle with live footage from norris’ car as he prepared to overtake Grosjean.

1st place

@dibhayles with live footage from Albon’s car as he punted Magnussen off the track … surely he was just saying: “Hello Kevin!”

And there you have it, this week’s funny tweet offerings.

Which one(s) tickled your fancy?

Let me know in the comments below.

The Funniest Tweet Awards will be back next week at the second Silverstone race, the 70th Anniversary F1 race.

Have a fab week.

x

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Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – Hungarian Grand Prix 2020

The earlier rain made for a damp and greasy track for the start of today’s Hungarian Grand Prix.

Crashing on his way to the grid, it was thanks to the hard work of his Red Bull engineers that Max Verstappen even started the race.

Most drivers opted to start the race on Inters, bar the Haas of Kevin Magnussen who had opted for full wets. However, after the formation lap was complete, both he and his team-mate Romain Grosjean opted to change their tyres for ‘slicks’.

Brave or foolhardy? Either way it seemed to pay off, as both Haas cars were, at one point early in the race running third and fourth.

As the lights went out, the grid mixed up significantly. Bottas went backwards, as did Perez. Both Ferraris moved up as well as the Haas’s. Hamilton though sailed off into the distance and by the end of lap 1 was 3 seconds clear of P2, by lap 3 was 7 seconds clear.

Maybe still not as exciting as the Austria, but better than Styria, the Hungarian Grand Prix provided some great tweets.

After a cup of tea, I have finally decided on a top 10.

This week’s Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards for the Hungarian Grand Prix are as follows:

10th place

@Charliebartman with live onbaord footage from Stroll’s Racing Point as he spent a good portion of the race in third.

9th place

Following his crash on the way to the grid, @TheF1Nerds have genuine footage of Verstappen as he fights off Bottas in the latter stages of the race.

8th place

@PatrickSikler with this tweet showing Gasly driving into the pits with his Honda engine smoking. He had been complaining about smelling something burning all weekend, during the race he finally found out what it was!

7th place

@RJoseRazoJr gives us a glimpse of Max Verstappen’s rear view mirror when he asked the pit wall how far behind him Bottas was.

6th place

@dibhayles with a picture of today’s lollipop man at Williams, who let Latifi leave his pit-box into the path of Sainz causing a puncture to Latifi’s new tyre.

5th place

@timwagner66 with the ‘real reason’ it took so long for the Red Bull engineers to fix Max Verstappen’s car before the race. Who else hates it when this happens with their phone?

4th place

@FvB2309 with unseen footage as Bottas attempted to overtake Leclerc and hit a puddle of water. Oops!

3rd place

@_DavidBroad_ with this tweet of Vettel in his pitbox waiting to be released, as during his pit stop everyone dived into the pits and he was stuck … waiting patiently.

2nd place

@TarasDemerson with the footage today’s stewards will need as they investigate Red Bull for drying the front of Alexander Albon’s grid box with a leaf blower before the start of the race.

1st place

This week’s winner is @stargateoracle with footage of Nicholas Latifi who had been running in the top 10 before THAT disastrous pitstop (see 6th place) put him right at the back of the field, where he finished the race, having been lapped 5 times!!!

And that’s it for this week’s Funniest Twwet Awards.

After 3 consecutive weeks, the F1 circus gets a break next weekend, but will be back on August 2nd for the first of two grands prix at Silverstone.

Hope you’ve enjoyed this selection of funny tweets? Which was your favourite?

Let me know in the comments below.

See you in two weeks time.

x

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Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – Styrian Grand Prix 2020 ‘Ferrari’ Special Edition

Following THAT lap 1 crash that caused a Ferrari DNF cue many funny tweets about it …

… that warranted a Top 10 all of its own.

10th place

@Krustylicious with footage of how Vettel probably isn’t losing too much sleep over losing his seat for 2021.

9th place

@PatrickSikler reflecting the feelings of Ferrari fans worldwide seeing both cars limp out of the race.

8th place

As we know, Vettel is leaving Ferrari at the end of the season, @Travisty_22 predicts how he might actually leave the factory …

7th place

@_DavidBroad_ with a sneak peak at the Ferrari debrief and how the strategists might try to explain to the drivers what to do next time …

6th place

@photo_gt97 with another exclusive from the Ferrari debrief

5th place

@pgillett2017 wonders if Ferrari’s run of bad luck might not be down to either the car or the drivers … after all they’ve had their moments over the last couple of years … makes you think …

4th place

Binotto was last seen leaving the pitwall with a bottle of Fanta in his hands. @timwagner66 reckons he’s going to need something a little stronger after the debrief!

3rd place

@Rone11e brings to our attention that the Ferrari media team skillfully predicted the length of time they would actually be in the race in this one tweet!

2nd place

@stargateoracle muses on the Ferrari Driver induction day for next season …

1st place

@dibhayles and a triibute to the team that used to be Ferrari … here’s hoping they find the magic again …

And that is it. A second race in Austria, not as exciting as the first granted, but thanks to Ferrari we managed to have some fun at least.

Which of these tweets tickled your fancy? Let me know in the comments.

The Funniest Tweet Awards will be back next week after the Hungarian Grand Prix.

x

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Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – Styrian Grand Prix 2020

What a difference a week makes!

OK, so this week’s race was by no means as action-packed as last week’s, but that’s not to say it didn’t have it’s moments.

This week’s race was a bit like a cheese sandwich: a boring filling enclosed in some rather scrumptious bread.

Following THAT lap 1 crash causing a Ferrari double DNF, which has created a special Funniest Tweet Awards all on its own, the race settled down to be fairly uneventful … until about 10 laps from the end when it all got rather exciting.

Perez, who had started to race way down in 17th (bang go my fantasy league points this week!) was carving his way through the field like a hot knife through butter and finally caught up with fourth placed Albon, 30-odd seconds adrift of the top 3. DRS was open and for several laps he tried to get passed, nearly managed it, and then the cars kissed, causing damage to Perez’s car for the final couple of laps.

Then there was Bottas who finally caught up with Verstappen and they began swapping places until finally Bottas made the moved stick.

There was also the battle for sixth, seventh and eighth between Norris, Stroll and Ricciardo. Finally on the final lap, and literally on the last couple of corners Norris channelled his inner Sonic and zoomed past both of them AND took Perez on final corner to finish fifth.

But enough about that. The funny tweets were as always as fast and furious as the race itself and I have at last whittled them down to ten.

So without further ado, here are the Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards for the Styrian Grand Prix 2020:

10th place

@pgillett2017 with live footage from the Haas pitwall when they see on the screens that their cars managed to pass each other WITHOUT colliding. Is that a first?

9th place

@FvB2309 with onboard action from Hamilton’s car, as he struggled with the medium tyres after his pitstop, following his radio message to Bono saying that his tyres were too spongy.

8th place

Talking of tyres, @JustinTalksF1 managed to get a behind-the-scenes exclusive from the Alpha Tauri pitwall as they asked Pierre Gasly what tyres he would like to change to …

7th place

@timwagner66 reminds us of ‘the good ol’ days’ when it wasn’t Ferrari having double DNFs due to driver collisions … Racing Point, Haas and even Mercedes and Red Bull …

6th place

@ChrisJKenworthy with on track footage of the two Racing Points tussling for track position.

5th place

@dibhayles with a snapshot from Kimi’s ‘driver-cam’ following the Ferrari clash ahead of him …

4th place

It wasn’t just the Haas team that Ferrari how team mates should pass each other, @TarasDemerson shows the McLaren team mates, Sainz and Norris in action.

3rd place

Talking of Lando Norris, @Rone11e has live in-car video footage of his final lap as he steamed past the three cars in front of him to claim fifth, and just in case anyone was wondering he’s now sitting third in the WDC!!!

2nd place

@TomTheMadHatter with unseen track footage of Perez as he hunted down Albon …

1st place

With the introduction of robot trollies bring the trophies to the winners AND if fantasy became reality in 2020 and Ferrari did manage to get a double podium (and I’m not for one minute saying that it couldn’t happen) @Jontys_Corner muses on what would happen if …

That concludes this Top 10 Funniest Tweets for the Styrian Grand Prix.

Let me know which is your favourite in the comments below.

And keep your eyes peeled for a Ferrari Special Edition … which will be posted very soon.

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Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards – Austrian Grand Prix 2020

Well, after 217 days the wait was finally over.

At 2:10 this afternoon it was indeed ‘lights out and away we go’ for the 2020 Formula 1 season.

And boy, was it worth the wait.

No one, absolutely no one could have predicted what would happen this afternoon.

Even before the race started, a 12th hour protest appeal by Red Bull (literally about 1½ hours before lights out) about the stewards lack of action over Lewis Hamilton failure to slow for waved yellows during yesterday qualifying, saw Hamilton demoted to P5 on the grid.

I can’t understand why they did that? If they had new evidence that the stewards didn’t have surely the correct time to lodge an appeal would have been last night after the initial ruling, not an hour or so before lights out. Or am I missing something? If I am please let me know in the comments below.

Anyway, back to the race. And, what a race!

We had cars dropping like flies, rogue tyres, spins, more safety cares than you could throw a stick at AND after what seems like a lifetime a McLaren clambered onto the podium.

On top of this, I felt very much like I was struggling on the return to school as my Twitter timeline was overwhelmed with an influx of super funny tweets.

I really wish I could use them all, it’s really difficult to judge them, but I have, after a very large mug of tea, managed to whittle them down to just 10.

So, without further ado, here are the Top 10 Funniest Tweet Awards for the Austrian Grand Prix:

10th place

@ChrisJKenworthy with live footage from Grosjean’s cockpit as he decides to investigate somewhere off the beaten track … literally! Martin Brundle even mentioned that the service road he investigated was the same one as last year, and that it must be programmed into his car’s sat-nav.

Guess it’s easily done?

9th place

@pgillet2017 poses an interesting question after the safety car was deployed for the umpteenth time this afternoon.

8th place

As Kevin Magnussen fails to apply the brakes before heading into the corner, @TomTheMadHatter shares live driver-cam footage of who’s really driving the car!

7th place

After, let’s face it, a very poor qualifying yesterday that had Vettel not even making Q3, and race pace that had Ferrari fighting mid-field rather than up front, @_DavidBroad_ has live footage from Leclerc’s car in the closing stages of the race.

6th place

@F1Loopy summing up the race in 1 tweet!!

5th place

@Travisty_22 with live footage of the Mercedes pit wall as they issue instructions to both drivers to stay off the kerbs, due to a potential problem with sensors.

4th place

@Jontys_Corner as the whole F1 audience watched the Vettel-Sainz drama unfold in slow motion, which resulted in Vettel spinning and us left with a feeling of deja-vu.

3rd place

@RJoseRazoJr with live footage from Grosjean’s car after Magnussen’s Haas crashed.

2nd place

@gijs_lagerweij with unseen footage from Kimi’s car as he puts his foot to the floor, but his tyre has other ideas … causing, you guessed it another safety car outing.

1st place

This week’s winner is reigning Funniest Tweet Champion, @timwagner66, with footage (and what has been the photo of the weekend) from the Red Bull pit wall as they protest to the stewards about Verstappen’s retirement caused by … um, well … Red Bull! (Did anyone else think ‘karma’ when it happened?)

And that’s it. The first set of Funniest Tweets for the 2020 season.

Did you enjoy today’s race? What was your takeaway moment?

Which of these tweets is your favourite, or did you find another that tickled your fancy?

Either way, let me know in the comments.

The Funniest Tweet Awards will be back next week.

Til then, I think I need another cuppa.

x

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5 rules of the road that are actually law

Do you remember The Highway Code? You know, that book we study religiously so we can pass our driving test, and then it never sees the light of day again. Let’s face it, most of their ‘rules of road’ are normally very quickly forgotten once we’ve passed our tests, as we deal with all the other road users who have forgotten the contents as well.

Is The Highway Code the law?

No, as it stands alone, The Highway Code is not law. However, many of its ‘rules’ are backed up by law, and if you disobey those rules you will be committing a criminal offence.

The rules in the Code, that are supported by the law can be identified by the use of the words ‘MUST’ and ‘MUST NOT’ instead of ‘should’ and ‘should not’. These rules also include reference to the legislation they relate to.

Here are five ‘rules of the road’ that drivers are wont to ignore, but are, in fact, enforceable by law:

Environmentally friendly

You’ve pulled up on the road outside the shop, your passenger jumps out to run and buy that pint of milk, and you sit there with the engine running.

You’re only going to be a few minutes, so you don’t need to turn the engine off, right?

Wrong!

Rule 123 of The Highway Code states that: “You MUST NOT leave a parked vehicle unattended with the engine running or leave a vehicle engine running unnecessarily while that vehicle is stationary on a public road.”

The rule goes on to state that if you are likely to remain stationary for more than a couple for minutes, you should switch off the engine to reduce emissions and noise pollution. The only time when it is permissible to leave the engine running is when you are in traffic or for diagnosing faults.

Obviously, if you are in traffic and it seems obvious that you may not be moving for some time, drivers should use a common sense approach and switch off the engine.

Don’t be a litterbug

We’ve all seen people do it. Those drivers, and passengers, who carelessly toss their rubbish out of their car window as it’s moving along.

Aside from all the environmental arguments, especially with the climate emergency being top of the agenda these days, it’s actually illegal to throw rubbish out of your car.

Rule 147 of the Code states: “You MUST NOT throw anything out of a vehicle; for example, food or food packaging, cigarette ends, cans, paper or carrier bags. This can endanger other road users, particularly motorcyclists and cyclists.”

Why would people do this anyway? (Answers in the comments below)

Mini roundabouts

Ok, hands up, who’s simply just driven over those painted mini-roundabouts? Especially if there’s no one coming the other way.

This is something we’ve probably all done, but guess what? Unless you’re driving a large vehicle, and a 4×4 doesn’t count as such, this could actually land you in trouble.

Rule 188 states the following: “All vehicles MUST pass round the central markings except large vehicles which are physically incapable of doing so. Remember, there is less space to manoeuvre and less time to signal.”

Something else most drivers have probably done is make a U-turn at a mini-roundabout. Yes? You might want to think twice about that as well. Although it’s not strictly a ‘MUST NOT’, the rule is written as ‘avoid’.

Lights and weather

Why do drivers:

a)            Forget to put their lights on when it’s foggy, or raining really hard?

b)            Put their fog lights on in bright sunshine, or at night?

Let’s face it, when it comes to fog, you’ve walked out of the house to get into the car and can see the weather, why would you not put your lights on? Do you have a death wish?

And in most cars it’s impossible to activate fog lights unless the lights are on, so why, unless you’ve accidentally nudged the ‘on’ switch, would you drive around in broad daylight with your fog lights or headlights glaring?

These are two of driving’s biggest unanswered questions, and again, if you know the answer to these conundrums, answers welcome in the comments below.

However, in either scenario, you are committing an offence.

Rule 226 states: “You MUST use headlights when visibility is seriously reduced, generally when you cannot see for more than 100 metres (328 feet). You may also use front or rear fog lights but you MUST switch them off when visibility improves.”

Likewise, Rule 236 states: “You MUST NOT use front or rear fog lights unless visibility is seriously reduced (see Rule 226) as they dazzle other road users and can obscure your brake lights. You MUST switch them off when visibility improves.”

How difficult is it for drivers to remember a simple rule: “If you can’t see your hand in front of your face, put your lights on and if it’s a bright sunny day, turn your lights off.”? (Unless you’re driving a car that automatically turns the lights, when you switch the engine on, e.g., Volvo)

Pavement parking

Parking wholly or partially on pavements has been making the news recently, with many councils now stepping in to take measures against it.

In this instance, according to The Highway Code Rule 244, in London it is illegal, but everywhere else the rule is that you should not, unless it is specified that you can.

However, there is a big difference between parking a little on the kerb to keep your vehicle out of the way of traffic and blocking the pavement entirely causing an obstruction which can seriously inconvenience pedestrians, people in wheelchairs or with visual impairments and people with prams or pushchairs.

So, unless you’re in London, it’s advisable to use common sense.

Now I want to hear from you?

Did you know any of these rules were enforceable by law?

What other rules do you know that are, but aren’t mentioned here?

Let me know in the comments right now.

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A Comedy of Errors and a shambolic day in Melbourne

To further quote that play by William Shakespeare: “Until I know this sure uncertainty, I’ll entertain the offered fallacy.”

Let’s face it, the confusion and speculation over whether the Australian Grand Prix should continue following the news that one of the McLaren team had tested positive for COVID-19 would not have looked out of place in a farce on the West End stage.

First it was on, then it was off, then no one was sure and then fans were turning up in anticipation of first practice.

There was news that both Kimi and Seb had already left Australia and some teams were already packing up, and yet the entire motorsport community including all the media guys in Australia were stumbling around in the dark.

All the while the FIA, Formula 1 and the organisers of the Australian Grand Prix remained silent. Jean Todt himself was out on an evening jolly instead of taking charge of the situation.

Finally, it was official that the Grand Prix would be cancelled. However, as yet there is still no word on whether there will be racing in Bahrain next week (!) or whether the inaugural Vietnamese Grand Prix will take place.

For fans and teams alike it’s disappointing and frustrating in equal measure:

Even though the organisers have said they will refund the money for their tickets, for the many fans who have saved up to buy tickets and maybe travelled half-way around the globe for the race it will undoubtedly not quite soften the blow.

And for the teams themselves it must be heart-breaking. All that hard work over the winter to get the cars ready in time for testing, and then literally at the last minute to be told: “Sorry guys!” means it was all for nothing.

There are so many questions I’m sure that will need answering, but most importantly why did it take so long to reach a decision and why was there no communication?

For what is seen as the pinnacle of motorsport to be shown up like this is saddening, especially as IndyCar, Formula E and WEC appear to be on the ball and more proactive in their approach to this global issue.

But what are you thought?

Do you think they should have raced?

How do you think this situation has been handled?

Let me know in the comments below.

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Everything you wanted to know about WRC …

… and more is in this amazing new book by Alexandru Dobai.

If you’re a devoted rally fan, then Alexandru’s labour of love, ‘The World Rallye Guide’, would be a superb addition to your bookshelf. And if you work in the industry, forget Google Search, this is your go-to, one-stop reference.

The book traces the World Rally Championship (WRC) from its inaugural championship race, the 1973 Monte Carlo Rally and includes every single round until the end of the 2019 season. That’s a total of almost 600 rounds.

The 800-page book is jam-packed with information. Each round has its own page and includes; top 10 classification, special stage winners, distances and starters and finishers, along with the rally plate and a picture.

There are also more than 40 pages of statistics and tables covering everything you always wanted to know, as well as a complete WRC record of drivers with at least three championship starts to their name.

‘The World Rallye Guide’ is available on Amazon as a Kindle eBook here, or in paperback here.

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